James L. McClinton, Ph.D.
It’s always “something”… A sheriff’s deputy pulled a man over in Bakersfield, Missouri, on a routine traffic stop. When the officer learned the driver lacked insurance, he informed him the car would be towed. Another deputy told him that, since it was so hot, he would give him a ride back to his residence. The driver agreed to the ride, but told the deputy that he first had to grab something out of the back of the car. It turned out that the “something” was some canned vegetables and a bucket of marijuana…lots of marijuana – over a pound – and multiple baggies of methamphetamine weighing 43 grams, a scale, a broken glass pipe, and a cell phone. The man was charged with felony drug trafficking. (Canned vegetables? Maybe they were also “high in fiber.”)
It looks like the “duh”-fendant gets to stay in Michigan for at least 558 more days… A Michigan man is going to find himself in jail for a few months after an outburst in court where he yelled at a Washtenaw County judge and told him to kiss his a**. It was a simple case of misdemeanor trespassing, but just as the judge was finishing up, the man decided to share his thoughts. At the first swearing, the judge had already heard enough. “You know what? No, no, no. You don’t come in here…” The man replied, “F*** you!” The judge said, adding “that’s contempt. That’s a 93 day misdemeanor.” After the man repeated the profanity, he was gifted with another 93 day misdemeanor charge. It happened a total of six times – and continued as the bailiff took him out of court in handcuffs. (Judge, I’d like to appeal this ruling to Judge Judy’s court.)
It’s all in the name… When law enforcement officers observed a white van on the I-5 near Weed, California (a city in Siskiyou County), they noticed it kept swerving out of its lane. The officers then engaged their lights and sirens and pursued the vehicle. The van didn’t stop and it traveled almost three miles before the driver pulled the vehicle over. Inside the van, they found 1,021 rooted marijuana plants which, according to the 53-year-old driver, were on their way to Oregon. However, the driver did not have the proper documentation from the California Department of Cannabis Control, so he was arrested and charged with illegal transportation and possession of marijuana. (Isn’t Weed located near Incarceration, California?)
Videotaping this crime spree is the best idea we ever had!… It’s a fact that Los Angeles is well-known as being home to many so-called “influencers” who take delight in showing off every aspect of their lives. That may have driven the actions of four criminal masterminds in that city. After pulling off a successful robbery at a 7-Eleven, one of them posted a picture of the cash on his Instagram account. He also tagged the accounts of his three accomplices on the post. Not surprisingly, this act of vanity proved to be a bad idea. Police used surveillance camera footage taken at this robbery and several other 7-Eleven robberies to easily link the crooks to the crimes. Frankly, I’m looking forward to his next influencer post – one of the tasty baloney sandwiches he’s enjoying at the jail. (The power of social media over dumb people is astounding.)
It was a slow day for the sheriff’s deputies… The Polk County Sheriff’s Office said an alleged shoplifter at a Walmart store in Lakeland, Florida, absconded with several items worth a total of $167.00. “Deputies pursued [the suspect] as he attempted his getaway on a stolen electric Walmart scooter,” the department said. The 35-year-old miscreant “hit speeds of about two mph on the scooter before deputies caught up to him” in front of a Dunkin’ Donuts. He was booked into jail pending a $13,500 bond, charged with petit theft, felony grand theft (of the $1,325 cart) and unlawful possession of a shopping cart. (We now know what the opposite of “Fast and Furious” looks like.)
This is probably the best antismoking commercial I’ve ever imagined… Police recently responded to a fire in the early morning hours at a U-Haul business in Roseburg, Oregon. One van was fully engulfed in flames and the fire was spreading to a second vehicle. Security footage from the area identified a 47-year-old woman whose van with “Nana’s Sweet Treats” on the side was seen in the area. When officers spoke with the woman, she admitted to siphoning gas from the U-Haul and then lighting a cigarette. She was charged a few days later with first degree criminal mischief and reckless burning. (She was subsequently “hauled” off to jail.)
I’d say they need a little work on their business acumen… A man and a woman in Louisville, Kentucky (where marijuana is illegal), showed their hand a little too publicly when they posted videos of their marijuana production processes to social media. The couple was arrested after a detective arranged to meet the female in a parking lot to buy some weed. During the exchange, she told the detective that she “packages the product on a ‘thousands level scale’ and had just completed a 1,000 pack order over the weekend.” Police seized 218 pounds of marijuana, worth about $450,000 on the street. (Gee, you mean law enforcement has access to social media?)
Background check…what’s a background check?… The 58-year-old Executive Director of St. Vincent de Paul of Bend, Oregon, was arrested on methamphetamine delivery and possession charges, accused of selling commercial quantities from his Redmond home within 1,000 feet of two schools. St. Vincent De Paul is a nonprofit which provides food, clothing, prescriptions, and transitional housing to help those who are in need. The Deschutes County Sheriff’s Office concluded a short-term investigation, finding scales, packaging materials and cash at his home. He was charged with delivering meth near a school (Class A felony) and possessing substantial quantities (Class C felony). It was also determined that, in 2009, he entered an Alford plea for meth possession and second-degree theft. (Drug testing for thee, but not for me…)
